The day was off to a bad start to begin with. We went for our final walk through and that was when we REALLY realized what we were up against. We knew this house was a bit of a fixer upper when we decided on it, but that day when we walked through we realized this was a HUGE FIXER UPPER!!! With it being our first home and having no experience in home renovation, my mind started racing… Were we ever going to make this house feel refreshed and new again?
Then, more worries...
Was this ever really going to feel like our own home? How are we going to do this on our own? Our family is back in Michigan so we didn't have anyone we could call up to help with work or projects. The last HUGE worry on my mind was that we were getting married in August in Michigan. I was still planning and working through all those long distance details, so how could I juggle that along with making this house our home? - Oh - and probably the most important of all (or there'd be no wedding or house) my full time gig at work.
I knew when we began house hunting that all of it would be going on but man, in that moment it all hit me- and I mean hit me like a brick to the gut. It felt more than overwhelming.
After we turned the key to the door and entered for the first time as the home owners, we just stared at the surroundings in silence. We decided to wait on popping the bottle of champagne since it didn't feel very celebratory. Then Alex left to meet his buddy to help move our big furniture.
There I was all alone in our home, the first home I/we have ever owned. I looked around at our piles of stuff, the ugly woodwork, wall colors, and ugh, just all the work that needed to be done. It didn't feel like my home and in that moment, I sat at the top of our stairs and cried... Loudly.... Sobbing... Gasping for air... Drippy nose... Wailing like an idiot. I still wonder if any of my new neighbors heard me that day? Needless to say, one of life's biggest milestones sure didn't play out the way I had imagined.
Now since I am telling this story a year later, I am happy to report that everything turned out fine (so far at least). We managed to get most of the rooms looking completely different in a matter of months, and we had a beautiful wedding! Following the wedding, we finally got our champagne popping moment when we returned home from our honeymoon as husband and wife in our (nicer looking) house. In that moment, it really felt like home.
Looking back, I can smile now when I think about that moment when I cried at the top of our stairs. I remember how much work we went through and how hard things were when we moved in. I'm amazed at how far our little 1924 Dutch Colonial came along in just over a year! Most of all though, it seems as though the place we imagined this fixer-upper to be is beginning to take shape and we're proud that it is ours.